I played hookie from work for the first time in my life.
And you know what? It kinda sucked.
My wife insists that I’ve ditched work before but I don’t count the time I called in sick a couple of years ago when we discovered major water and mold damage at our house because I spent that day moving furniture out of the home office and into the garage.
Let’s face it, I’m the guy who refused to call in sick from a job I didn’t like several years ago so I could go in for a job interview with a great company.
How do I know I missed out on working for a great company? My wife got the job, that’s how I know.
With a boneheaded work ethic like that I’m positive that she’s wrong about me playing hookie before.
No, until this week I’d never taken a “mental health day” from school or work … which probably explains a lot.
So what did I do with my big day?
I got up around 6:30 in the morning, same as usual, so I could get my son to child care.
Who starts off a fun day by getting up that early when they really don’t have to?
After that I went to the doctor to get my flu shot and whooping cough vaccination.
Another bad call.
What a boring way to start a day off.
To bastardize a line from “Better Off Dead,” going to a doctor when you’re not really sick is really sick.
I spent the rest of the day shopping, working in the yard, organizing the garage, doing laundry, cleaning the house and scooping our cat’s litter box.
Do I know how to party or what?
The historic day ended with an annoying late-evening trip to the hardware store to find screws for the dresser in the nursery.
When your pregnant wife has red-hot nesting fever you do what you have to do.
As luck would have it, the screws I bought didn’t even fit.
A perfectly unsatisfying ending to a perfectly unsatisfying day.
Not exactly a re-enactement of “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” is it?
Maybe if they made a sequel this is what Ferris’ day off would look like if he matured into a boring middle-aged family man.
Now that I’m several days removed from my not-so-magical day off my back is killing me from all the work I did and my arm is aching like mad from the whooping cough vaccine.
Weeks before I took the day off I had grand visions for what a spur-of-the-moment day off from work would be like.
There would be lots a baseball, beer, junk food, cigars and movies. And none of the action would start until I slept in a couple of hours.
But instead of living the dream I busted my butt all day.
I would have had it easier if I had just gone to work.
Mental health days are overrated. See you at the office.