Nothing says home sweet home like Han Solo in carbonite

Checking in with this week’s rambling thoughts …

* I’ll admit that the fact that I shop around online for stuff like this is a clear sign that I need help.  
I just got done clearing out an entire room of crap and I turn right around and start shopping for more crap.
I think it would be a very nice addition to our living room.
* My vote for worst office smell is microwaved leftover fish at lunch, hands down.  
It’s horrible, putrid, an absolute nightmare odor and it has to be stopped.  Someone at my office regularly nukes fish in the break room and it makes the entire side of the building smell like the bay at low tide. 
Awful, just awful.
* Fun to see on my commute: The lady with the “I Love My Big TaTa’s” bumper sticker. 
I’ve never gotten a look at her but I’m obviously intrigued. 
* Bad to see on my commute: A driver in front of me with a back window full of stuffed animals. 
It seems like that always means an automatic drop to 10 mph under the speed limit and a kiss goodbye to any shot at getting through an upcoming yellow light.

* I salute Joey Greco of “Cheaters.”  
I have no idea how he does his absurd job with a straight face.  
The rat bastard may chum for sharks at the shallow end of the gene pool but the guy deserves an Emmy for pretending he takes all that B.S. seriously.  

* I am absolutely living my life on Parent Time which seems to be just a tick slower than the speed of light.   
It feels like just yesterday that I was dragging my way through a Monday that was taking forever and now the weekend is on my doorstep.  
At this pace my wife’s December due date will be here in no time.
* Little known fact about the 2002 Toyota Highlander: It has the most sensitive horn on the planet. I’ve probably pissed off two or three dozen people in less than a year of ownership just by lightly bumping the steering wheel. 
* Awesome feature on the 2002 Highlander: A tape deck.  All those cassette tapes I’ve had store away since the ’80s?  They’re back and I’m rockin’ it old school on my drive to work.
* FYI to anyone at a restaurant who gives a wary glare in my family’s direction when we come in and sit down at a table next to you with my 16-month-old son: You could do worse. A lot worse.
The more time I spend around my son at restaurants the more impressed I am.  Sure, there’s the occasional yelp or scream but overall he’s a really quiet kid when we’re out in public.  He just chills out, eats his food, plays with his toys and watches the world go by.
I’ve had the bad luck plenty of times of being stuck next to a table full of cranks whining about service and food; stupid, chirpy, empty-headed high school girls; and loud, obnoxious drunks and I can guarantee you that I’d pay real money to be seated next to a kid like mine any day of the week. 
* Note to A’s manager Bob Geren: Is it really that hard to make a lineup that doesn’t have Daric Barton (aka Scott Hatteberg Lite) batting second? Speedster Rajai Davis is really the man you want buried in the middle of the lineup hitting seventh? 
No wonder your Twitter account @Bobgeren was suspended, what could you possibly have to say in your defense?
The easiest and most sensible thing in the world to do is to move Davis to No. 2 and Barton to No. 3 in the lineup.
With Coco Crisp, Davis and Barton at the top of the lineup you have speed and on-base percentage loaded up in front of Kurt Suzuki, Kevin Kouzmanoff and Jack Cust.
Wild and crazy idea isn’t it Bob?
I can’t wait for Don Wakamatsu to get your job in the offseason.
Have fun in your new career fetching lunch and dry cleaning as Super Special Assistant to Billy Beane.
I think you just might be slow enough on the uptake to think you got a promotion.
* One more on the A’s in case anyone with any clout in the A’s organization is reading this blog: Keep Chris Carter in the bigs.  
Sure, he’s going to boot the ball in the outfield and he’ll strikeout at a rate that puts Jack Cust to shame but the time is now to get the learning curve out of the way.  
Carter always seemed to struggle each time he moved up a level in the minors but he also always seemed to go on a tear as soon as he got his feet wet.
This season is a lost cause, don’t waste any more at bats on Matt Watson, Matt Carson or Gabe Gross.
The sooner Carter gets used to big league pitching the better.
Why squander the early part of next season when the A’s may actually be ready to make a dark-horse run at the AL West crown?

* No more pretending I give a damn about weight loss and no more half-assing with the horrible crap I eat.

Time to hit the gas pedal on the road to self destruction and eat this at every freakin’ meal:

See ya in the next life. 

* I love my wife to bits but she amuses the hell out of me sometimes.
Just the other day before heading out to go grocery shopping she asked me to do some work around the house and led into her request with, “If you’re so motivated could you please …”
I’m a lot of things but motivated to do household chores is definitely not one of them.
She’s so darn cute when she says things like that.

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