I hate false advertising

Here's one more example that every newspaper owned by Dean Singleton eventually becomes a bad joke …

I surfed over to ContraCostaTimes.com this morning to see what the local paper had to offer today and was naturally drawn to the Celeb Pics link at the side of the page.

Who could resist?

The CCT was teasing to a slideshow full of Megan Fox photos.  Could there possibly be a better way to start the day?

I enthusiastically clicked on the "Slide show" link and waited for the "Transformers" hottie to fill my screen.

Know what I got?

Betty Freakin' White.

Trust me, expecting Fox and getting a Golden Girl was like being thrown into an ice-cold shower.

The CCT pulled the most twisted bait and switch I've ever seen.

Maybe I should go easy on the San Francisco Chronicle for it's Seenster feature on its Web page?

At least they deliver when they promise readers photos of lusty, busty ladies.

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Just a bunch of boobs over at the Chronicle

It's official: The San Francisco Chronicle has finally jumped the shark.

Prominently displayed on the paper's Web site today is a new feature called Seenster which is the Chron's "new photo feature full of big fun at local bars."

Click over to http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2009/06/22/seensters.DTL and you get a nice assortment of primo bimbo shots from a San Francisco bar along with photos of various drunken buffoons.

I'd love to know what idiot in an executive office at the Chron was behind this absurd new feature.

Don't get me wrong.  I love clueless, scantily clad young women as much as the next pathetically overweight dirty old man, but that's not why I check SF Gate several times a day.

I have this funny notion that when I surf over to the Gate that I'm going to get my fill of news.

Guess I was wrong.

No wonder newspapers are dying.

Could the Hearst Company just put the Chron out of it's misery and pull the plug now?

Less than a man but more than a pillow

All I can say to the people at Dealnews.com is thank you for the Hug Me Pillow.

Thank you so very much for keeping an eye out for can't-miss deals like this: http://dealnews.com/Hug-Me-Pillow-for-25-3-s-h/302263.html at http://www.overstock.com/Home-Garden/Hug-Me-Pillow/1676854/product.html?cid=128291&fp=F&srccode=cii_13736960&cpncode=21-21399387-2.

With an almost-2-month-old son screaming his lungs out this morning after fussing for most of last night I needed a good laugh and the Hug Me Pillow has saved the day.

Part male torso, part pillow and totally absurd, the Hug Me Pillow is selling for just $24.97 on Overstock.com today.  Hard to believe a retailer ended up with more Hug Me Pillows than they could sell.

At least the reviews at Overstock.com show a sense of humor about the Hug Me Pillow with one woman even going so far as to say she doesn't mind it when her husband goes out of town anymore now that she has the Hug Me Pillow to keep her company.

The reviews at Amazon.com are entertaining too (http://www.amazon.com/Boyfriend-Pillow-Bachelorette-Husband-Sexiest/product-reviews/B000PJBXLG/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1) with one guy using the pillow as a fallback option when a his pickup lines at the bar fail miserably.

According to the product details at Overstock.com the Hug Me Pillow is dry clean only.  I'm sure that has led to plenty of awkward moments at local dry cleaners all across America.

I wish I worked at a store that was selling this thing just so I could get a good look at the people who were spending their hard-earned money to snuggle up with this bizarre product.

Mental leftovers


This post used to be a weekly swing through all the odds and ends that didn’t quite fit into any other blog post during the week but for now it’ll just have to be the musings of a sleep-deprived first-time father trying to escape the shackles of Twitter ….

* Oh yeah, have I mentioned that TWGB is also on Twitter? I tweet a little more often than I blog so if you’re a glutton for punishment check out http://twitter.com/howlingmadjay.

* My son is only a month and a half old now and I can’t believe how much we’re already spending on diapers. If all that money went into a 529 plan (http://www.sec.gov/investor/pubs/intro529.htm) instead of an endless supply of diapers there would probably be a decent amount of cash for a college education in 18 years. Oh well, it’s not like I’m going to stop using toilet paper anytime soon just to save a buck so I might as well keep stocking up on Pampers. Dealing with shit is just an inescapable part of everyone’s life.

* I was at a wedding recently and one thing never changes: I. Love. Open. Bars. I’m like a little kid on Christmas morning every time I go to a wedding and I realize that the booze is going to flow freely through the whole event.

* Speaking of alcohol, I was at St. George’s Spirits Distillery in Alameda last weekend (http://www.stgeorgespirits.com/) for a tour and vodka tasting and one thing really stood out: The Hangar One vodka infused with chipotle chiles. It’s an odd mix but it’s definitely worth a try. But if eating one too many chipotle chicken wings in Arizona has taught me anything it’s that the evil chile is almost as hot going out as it is going in. I’m glad I only had a small taste of St. George’s red-hot offering because I may have been in a lot of pain if I tossed back an entire glass of the chipotle vodka.

* Looks like I’m not alone in knocking the A’s selection of Jemile Weeks over Brett Wallace in last year’s draft. A’s Director of Baseball Operations Farhan Zaidi says the team made the wrong call (http://www.contracostatimes.com/sports/ci_12496104). I’m sure Weeks must enjoy reading that.

* Don’t forget to check out TWGB on Twitter at http://twitter.com/howlingmadjay where this brand of stupidity is dumbed down to 140 characters.

* I read somewhere that a family friend claims that Jon Gosselin, the dad on annoying reality TV trainwreck “Jon and Kate Plus 8,” doesn’t have any ambition. Now that I’m a dad I can see why. I only have one kid and I’ve run out of the time and energy to be ambitious about anything. Poor Jon has eight screaming kids and a witch for a wife, how the heck would he be able to be ambitious about anything other than a divorce from Kate?

* Back to the A’s. One thing they’ve really needed all season is a reliable left-handed relief pitcher. I know someone who’d be a great fit. He’s pitching for the Florida Marlins and he has a 2.55 ERA with 26 strikeouts and just 15 hits in about 24 innings this season. Kid’s name is Dan Meyer (http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/players/7426) … the same Dan Meyer who was the prized prospect the A’s received from the Braves for Tim Hudson (not this Dan Meyer who seems a lot cooler http://www.danmeyer.org/). It just figures that Meyer sucked the entire time he was with the A’s and as soon as he leaves he becomes a competent Major League pitcher.

* One more A’s complaint: While driving around the Bay Area a few weeks ago to introduce my son to members of my family I found that the worst reception I got while tuning in to the A’s on the radio was when I was right by the Oakland Coliseum. What’s up with that? I shouldn’t have to be 30 miles away from the ballpark to get a clean signal.

* I finally saw “Star Trek” (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0796366/) a couple of weeks ago and I have to say it’s a fun little flick but it must be incredibly boring being a barber on Vulcan. You’d spend your entire career giving bowl cuts to painfully dull guys all day long.

* Mr. T + baseball = Awesomeness (http://www.totalprosports.com/blog/index.php/2009/05/mr-t-sings-take-me-out-to-the-ball-game-at-the-cubs-game/)