1. Don't line you pockets with money from health care clients when you're applying for a job to reform the health care system (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/20/us/politics/20daschle.html?ref=washington).
2. Don't cheat on your taxes when you're applying for a prominent tax-paid job.
3. Give LensCrafters a try, champ. They have all the latest designer frames at great prices. I mean, buddy, what's up with those glasses? It looks like you mugged a deranged grandmother for her spectacles. Is that supposed to be a hot look in South Dakota?
Don't let the door hit you on your way out genius.